blizzardbox | We're painted red to fit right in

We're painted red to fit right in

[For the last six months, the Matsuno household has been abnormally quiet.

There's no running up and down the stairs. No boistrous chatter over breakfast. No brawls breaking out in the bedroom at night. No games of Mahjong on a cold night and then yet more fights breaking out over that.

There is silence.

Only three people have been living in that house, and it's quieter than it's ever been. The only brother- the eldest- remaining rarely left it anymore. He rarely left the bedroom upstairs, to be precise. Sometimes he'd venture up onto the roof, but even that got too hard to swallow with all the constant reminders of how they'd all left him.

One by one, they all left. Not a single one of them had come back since, not even to check up on one another.

It had taken about this long for Osomatsu to finally stop caring. After all, it seemed like he cared a lot more than anyone else did. It was the only reason he was still even here, sleeping in an empty futon and eating his meals around an empty table. Eventually he did this less and less and left the futon only long enough to relieve himself. Back to bed, back to sleep, back to unconsciousness where he didn't have to think unless he started dreaming. He didn't talk to his parents much, but when he did he still had a knack for making things seem okay when they really weren't. It's the only reason he was able to scoot by barely living until his body just couldn't take it anymore.

Karamatsu had been sleeping in after having yet another failed interview when he was awoken to Chibita shaking him roughly and trying to give him the phone. "It's for you, idjit," Karamatsu barely made out as he fumbled the phone a few times before blearily getting it to his ear. Within a minute of receiving the phone and hanging it up, Karamatsu had thrown his clothes on and bolted out the door without telling Chibita what was going on. He hadn't even gotten any of his things, he just.

Went.

Osomatsu wasn't doing well. It was like, ever since his brothers left, he just...hadn't gotten better. Matsuyo didn't even know what to do to help her oldest son anymore, but she had known that his brothers would want to be there with him if he was this bad off. Karamatsu, for his part, couldn't believe it. Osomatsu, of all of them? Surely not...

And yet, it was unfortunately true. Karamatsu had actually been the first Matsuyo got hold of since he was living close by with Chibita. It had given Karamatsu a chance to see Osomatsu alone, which he was grateful for. The Osomatsu he'd come home to wasn't the Osomatsu he'd left, wasn't even the Osomatsu he'd dragged out of the room that night before Choromatsu left. He was buried under months of depression and what was left was battered and nearly completely withered away. That alone was enough to completely shatter Karamatsu's heart, but what he really couldn't take was seeing his younger siblings filter home one by one.

Jyushimatsu. Todomatsu. Choromatsu.

Two days passed and only five sons were home. Osomatsu was getting worse. He'd stopped eating entirely and would barely tolerate water. Not only that, but the fourth of their number- Ichimatsu- was nowhere to be found. He couldn't be contacted. No job, no number, no home. It was like he'd vanished off the face of the earth. Before Matsuyo could completely expire from the stress, though, Karamatsu offered himself up to go find him. He'd take Todomatsu's phone with him so he could keep in touch, just in case. The others should stay behind with Osomatsu.

That had been three hours ago, and now Karamatsu found himself in a largely unfamiliar ward of Tokyo. After a light-speed search of their hometown, he'd begun asking around. Have you seen someone who looks like me?

No. Sorry. Nobody like that.

Where was he?

Karamatsu couldn't stop looking, he had to be somewhere here. He didn't care if he got looks for shouting in the streets, because he knew his voice among all of theirs was the most recognizable should Ichimatsu happen to hear it.

He had to be here.]

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[Karamatsu just nods, following Ichimatsu quietly. He would have offered to go get him some clothes and towels, maybe...but now he's not going to leave him even for a second. Not unless he says he can.]

[He wanders into the bathroom and pauses, almost awkward about taking off his clothes. They've been naked around each other countless times in their lives, and he's never been a creature with shame, but... He's so skinny, right now. He's unhealthy, and frankly he's not sure he wants to look at himself or know how easy it is to count his ribs. He doesn't figure Karamatsu does, either. But it would probably be stranger to shoo him out, at this point, so he just slowly peels himself out of his gross clothing and curls inward in some kind of attempt at modesty.]

[And it's... probably worse than Karamatsu realized. He's sickly thin, bruised and scraped in odd places. There are a number of worrying, thin scars in mostly innocuous places on his arms, too methodical in their placement to be cat scratches. His skin hangs off him in places it shouldn't, stretched from being rounded in health. His frame, at least, is still reasonably solid, carrying the same bone structure as the rest of them, but the musculature supporting his skeleton has worn away to make him look smaller still. He stands at an angle, rubbing at one of his arms, and glances over at Karamatsu, frowning.]

...I'm probably gonna scare everybody, looking like this.

[The only way Karamatsu can keep his alarm at Ichimatsu's haggard appearance from showing is by feigning resting a hand against his chin, letting his fingers come up over his mouth. It's because of this, really, that he only speaks when spoken to.]

You shouldn't...worry about that right now, Brother. We will make sure you are well again. Soon enough.

[He smirks, faintly, as much of a ghost of how the expression used to wear on his features as the rest of him, and steps into the closed-off portion of the bathroom where he can actually bathe. He leaves the door cracked just enough for him to still be able to talk to Karamatsu without having to raise his voice, and goes about a slow, methodical process of making himself human again.]

[It probably takes him nearly thirty minutes, and he probably nearly fell asleep sitting in the bath, but he pushes the door open again and frowns, pawing around in a confused search for a towel.]

...I don't really think it's been enough time that I should have forgotten where we keep towels.

Oh- h-hang on.

[Karamatsu, admittedly, had almost fallen asleep himself while he was waiting, his head lolling forward against his chest as he listened to the distant sounds of Ichimatsu in the bath. He's quick to stand and grab a single towel that had been left in here when there usually were more...except he knew where all the others had gone. Straight to be used for Osomatsu, never having gotten a chance to be washed before he winded up in ICU.

He walks it over, keeping his gaze centered elsewhere for Ichimatsu's sake.]

I'm...going to have to retrieve some clothes for you. Will you be alright until I do that?

[He offers a vaguely sympathetic gaze to his brother as he starts out of his half-doze to find and hand him a towel, drawing it to himself and nodding as he slinks back into the tiled room filled with steam. He dries himself off before he worries about his hair, tugging idly at the ends of it and realizing how long it's gotten.]

[He perches on the edge of the bathtub with the towel draped over his waist, idly watching the water drain from the tub and swaying slightly to a tune he doesn't bother to hum.]

[When Karamatsu returns, it's with some of the most comfortable clothes he can find, at least for Ichimatsu. He's got his old hoodie along with a pair of sweatpants along with some underwear he snatched up, knowing that where they're headed dressing up too fancy won't be an issue, really. He just wants Ichimatsu to feel comfortable for once in literal months.]

Feeling better?

[He wobbles back to his feet and shuffles back to the doorway, holding the towel at about waist-level in some strange misplaced sense of modesty, one corner of his mouth barely upturned in a smile. He nods, and claims his clothes from Karamatsu, and the other corner follows suit, the smile small and fond as he looks down at the sweater.]

...a little. 'm tired, but sleeping can wait.

[Mostly dry, he steps out onto the mat in the small outer area of the bath, draping the towel over a basket in favor of climbing into his clothes. And it is a bit of a climb, but thank God for drawstring pants so he won't accidentally flash anyone trying to shuffle down a hallway at the hospital. The hoodie isn't specifically any warmer than what he'd been wearing, save for perhaps the worn soft lining, but something about wearing it dances comforting heat across his skin and he hugs it to himself, just a touch.]

...um. Thanks. I guess we ...should go, now, did you hear from Mom?

I haven't, not yet.

[Karamatsu glances sidelong at Ichimatsu once he's fully dressed, remembering just how rail thin he'd been without the clothes there to cover it up.]

We should get you something to eat, first. Then we can go.

[He frowns a little at that, more distractions, but nods. It's... probably not a bad idea. If Karamatsu sees him eat at least he'll have one testimonial that he's not dying. He squirms around in his clothing, but moves to stand closer to him.]

...I guess.

[Well that, and Karamatsu doesn't plan on actually leaving until Ichimatsu eats, no matter how long it takes.

Before he leaves the bathroom, though, he reaches back carefully for Ichimatsu's hand, curling his fingers around it himself this time before leading the way into the hallway.]

[Ah. This was nice. He'd never wanted to be affectionate with Karamatsu, but having him suddenly there and supportive of him was... Beyond amazing. He curls his fingers into his brother's and shuffles along after him.]

Just... something quick is fine.

[Something quick is all they'll have most likely, but thankfully there's bound to be something in the pantry. And though Karamatsu could find something evens simpler like a granola bar, he wants to give Ichimatsu something warm.]

We have some instant ramen, I think. It won't take long to make.

[There's a vague sort of smile on his face.]

That's nostalgic.

Have you had it in some time?

[He decides to ask, realizing a beat later that it was probably an insensitive question. Too late to take it back; they're in the kitchen, now, and Karamatsu's letting go of Ichimatsu's hand so he can actually retrieve a kettle to boil water in.]

[He doesn't take it poorly, just shaking his head like it's a normal question to be asked and settling to lean nearby.]

The couple I mentioned that picked me up off the street... They took me to a little ramen stand.

Did they? That was kind of them.

[Bless them for caring enough to keep an eye on Ichimatsu out there. He might really have found a corpse if it weren't for them. He thinks this as he crosses the kitchen, filling the kettle with water before putting it on the heat.]

I hope that one day I will be able to properly thank them for helping you when you needed it.

[He makes a quiet affirmative sound, swaying a little where he stands, bracing a hand against the wall for a moment and then frowning.]

...'m gonna sit, [He mumbles, and then does just that, even if it's sort of more of his knees dropping out from under him. He's been standing too long, and the bath got him all sleepy, so basically his everything is rebelling. He blinks once he's down, having fully intended to make that shift himself, and just repositions himself sheepishly.]

[Karamatsu wasn't looking when Ichimatsu more or less fell to the floor, at least, so Ichimatsu won't have to worry about being chided for standing too long. Waiting for the water to boil is like watching paint dry, but he gives Ichimatsu silence until that is complete and the ramen is busily cooking away.

Only then does he turn his attention back to his brother sitting on the floor.]

Are you alright?

[He gives him something of a withering glance that isn't half as scathing as he might have meant for it to be on a regular day, and then closes his eyes for a while.]

...I can't fake being okay, Karamatsu. [He looks at his knees, frowning.] Mom's gonna freak out. Osomatsu's-- not okay, and then I'm a damn mess. It's not fair to her.

That is not your fault.

[Karamatsu insists, deciding to crouch a little in front of Ichimatsu on one knee while the ramen does its thing.]

You at least are in well enough condition to walk. You aren't confined to a- a-

[A hospital bed.]

She will just be happy seeing you again. And having us all together again.

[For what short time that might be.]

[A quiet sound, because he knows what he didn't finish saying. He nods anyway, hugging his knees to himself like he so often does.]

... It should have been me, really.

[From the crazed way he says that, he probably didn't mean to actually say it out loud.]

[Karamatsu has no business acknowledging that, but he does it anyway.]

No. ...no no.

[He hunches further.]

It should, though. Osomatsu has something going for him. He's like the leader of the pack. I'm just the asshole cat guy who should have died beside a dumpster.

[He's. Actually smiling as he says this. Ichimatsu please.]

[I mean. Karamatsu isn't surprised, but that doesn't mean he likes where this conversation is going.]

I would prefer if no one had to go through this, personally. It is hard for everyone.

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